Life, confessions, obsessions and regrets.
The last few years have been pretty rough. A lot has happened and I have changed a lot.
I’ve got a lot to say and a lot on my mind. I’m gonna unleash here and some of it may be hard to read.
Three years ago I thought I had it all figured out; home, good job, the best friends in the world, a woman who loved me and supported me. How much I had to learn; about love, life, friendship, and happiness.
When the woman I called mine left me, it was a slap in the face but one I definitely needed. I had become comfortable, complacent. I’ve been depressed for a while, and the slap hurt so much at the time that I went numb and into autopilot or survival mode. I’m not sure I ever fully came back from that place.
As I look back over the last few years, I have many regrets. But most of all; not being true to myself. I consider myself an honest, nice person. But I have lied, cheated, compromised, and stolen. Every single event pains me and causes me endless guilt, and I hope to eventually admit and apologize to all the people I’ve hurt.
The purpose of this post was initially to help me clear the air in my head, but now I think I’ve found it’s true purpose; I pledge to get the help I need to be happy, I pledge to be a better person.
Hopefully I will post more soon.